Bathtub Art Museum--Bathtub Sport

A Story about two Crazy Norwegian guys on a little Bathtub Adventure. Story sent in and translated by Rory Morrish who lives in Oslo, Norway. He found the article in a magazine called Fjell Og Vidde from 5/97. Also, Vidar the explorer contacted me recently. How exciting it was to exchange a few emails with this adventurous fella. Vidar has not disappointed us with his expeditions since this one, while none have been in a bathtub, he's gone to the North Pole and designed a seagoing snowmobile, seagoing car with carvan and seagoing dog sledge. Wow!

- Badekaret skal ut! The bathtub must go! This as well as the colour of the bathroom was the discussion over dinner while visiting my sister. Maybe you have some use for a bath tub, Vidar? Once again I was been offered some old scrap. It didn't take longer then three quarters of a steak, a big spud and a few spoon fulls of American vegetable mix before the idea hit me: I will travel with the bat tub through Nordmarka ( Nordmarka is a wilderness of forest, rivers lakes and hills just north of Oslo city where most people from Oslo spend their recreational time).

The tour needed someone with some expedition experience. I laid my plans out to Robert Blomberg. Robert, among other things has experience from fishing in Oslo fjord. We started our physical and psychological training. The physical part was mostly made up of different sitting and lying positions in the bat tub and carrying techniques over long stretches. The psychological was how were we to behave towards the other people we came across in Nordmarka and how to answer intelligently their question "what's it ye're doing, then?" A bath is made to bathe in. Therefore we had to modify the tub to survive the rough tour life in Nordmarka. The modifications began. Every free day in May we both sat in our tubs, boring, sanding, welding and screwing so as the change over from water to land-mobile could be done easily.

One Wednesday afternoon at the end of May we swung up route 4 and up to Nordmarka. Despite the cold wind in Nordmarka the mood was tops. There lake Mylla lay before us. Covered in ice. A bath tub is not the best icebreaker so we got cold feet and turned back.

The postponement allowed us to test the bat tubs hydrodynamic abilities. Under one of the trial using Robert's model Prima A the bath tub went under the waterline. Robert's prognosis was that it was much faster to fill a bath tub in the out doors then indoors. The two 25 L floating drums on either side of the tub sprung from their bindings like two champagne corks and with 50 kgs of rock to simulate tour equipment the bath tub hit the bottom 5m under with a clang (a clang we didn't hear but one has to fantasize a little). We managed to rescue the sunken tub and now felt well-prepared.

A collection of bathtubs cycle parts and scrap wood one normally drives to the dump . Therefore I think we turned some confused heads as we once again swung up route 4 and into the woods. After a few hours rigging and arranging the baggage in the tubs we were clear for boarding. Easier said then done. Where in the world was I going to sit? Those responsible for the logistics of the expedition had clearly miscalculated a bath tubs loading capacity. I made a hole in the baggage for my back side, put my legs over the baggage and stuck the oars under my knees. Sat fairly well but a tricky position to row with. Robert's Prima A, which was more square, with out the fine lines of mine own, was more roomier. He was able to maintain a more normal rowing position. To the extent it is possible in a bath tub. I hoped that my bat tubs streamline looks and the enamelled and smooth surface would compensate for Roberts effective rowing. This it didn't do at all. I got blisters over and under my knees, in whatever position I rowed.

When I, after some time splashing with my oars in the water, could still read the direction signs from the spot where we launched our tubs, I decided this was to much. I had to lad to rearrange the baggage. With half the baggage in a watertight bag on a rope I crossed Mylla at a good pace. 2 kilometers in 2 hours was better then I had hoped.

Progress in the air! Finally I was able to try out my 2 x 2 meter flowery shower curtain. Katnosa is by Nordmarka standards a big lake so like the old schooners of old I hoisted my rigging for a rapid crossing of the lake. Robert began to row in circles, but with the wind in my sails I was sure to catch him before he got half way-It might have been possible if it hadn't been for the wind, which farther out had turn into a headwind. Well even a old seaman can make a mistake. I realise that the bath tub was not the best at tacking. I saught out a safe haven where I could take down my shower curtain without danger for the 15 cm waves coming over the bow.

After three days and 30 kilometres our experience was that it is much faster to roll a bat tub then it is to row one, not to mention trying to sail one. The decision as to whether we would row or roll along by the side of lake Hakloa was a short one. The forth and last expedition day was the easy last leg. Over lake Bjørnsjøen , into Bjørnholt Cabin for food and the long awaited downhill stretch to Skar. After sitting in a crooked sitting position and rowed in 4 days I went to the doctor on a Monday. She gave me 14 days sick leave for torn muscles in my under arms.